China Releases Transcript Of Astronaut Conversations. Before The Rocket Is Launched.

China released news of their latest space launch, including transcripts of detailed dialogue between the space vehicle and the base. All several hours before the actual rocket left the launch pad. Surely that little Olympic athlete was of legal competition age, right. Read the story here.

Kentucky Town Drunk Arrested Over 1,300 Times!

Henry Earl of Kentucky has been arrested over 1,300 times, mostly for public intoxication, and has spent over 5,000 days in custody. Avoid hangovers Henry, stay drunk! Read the story here.

28! Students Suspended. For Cooking Breakfast. Next Time, Just Smoke Pot In The Bathroom Kids! Make It Count.

I find it hard to believe that the kids realize "it was a foolish thing to do", unless of course they are referring to the knucklehead administrators suspending them. Read the story here.

Politician Wants To Pay Women To Be Made Infertile!

Louisiana representative says lower income people have more babies, drain resources, wants to pay women $1,000 to voluntarily have their tubes tied, preventing pregnancy. Many are outraged, but come on, you know what he says is true. I'm outraged, they are offering too much, we should start at $100! Read the story here.

German's Build An Upside Down House. Just Because.

All that expense just to enable an alternative point of view? Or did they really have the blueprints upside-down? Read the story here.

Antipodes Map. Drill Through The Earth And See What's Exactly On The Other Side From You.

What a cool map, just find your location on the top map and the bottom shows where you would be on the other side of the Earth. On this side I am in Humble, TX, right in the path of Hurricane Ike. On the other side I would be drowning in the ocean! Great choices. Fun and a cool diversion from all this hurricane worrying. Visit the site here.

Dad Finds Naked Boy In Daughter's Room, Hits Him With Pipe! I'd Have Done The Same.

Now the question is, what to hit the daughter with? Read the story here.

Hurricane Ike Hours Away From Houston- And ME! Check Out This Windspeed Prediction Site.

Excellent and interesting site, just roll the cursor over your zip code, see the projected wind speed, and kiss your stuff goodbye. I am in 77346 just so you know, 87 MPH sustained winds. Visit the site here.

Mugger Picks Female Victim. Woman Happens To Be Four Time Italian Karate Champion. Woman Kicks Mugger's Ass.

In a case of getting exactly what you deserve this sleazy mugger picked a female potential victim who just happened to be a black belt, four-time Italian Karate champ. After putting the hurt on the crook, Italian police haul him away. Read the story here.

The News Is Australian Man Bitten By Venomous Brown Snake. The Odd Part Is He Was Bitten On The Penis!

The call of nature on a lonely road, but still, you should always look carefully, especially in Australia where everything is deadly. This poor fellow stooped to do his business and a deadly Brown snake bit him on the penis. Read the story here.

And In Related Penis News, Giant Ice Penis Found Floating In The Ocean

An iceberg that is anatomically correct has been found floating in the sea near Antarctica. Naturally shaped or the product of oversexed penguins? We may never know. It's only a matter of time before the conservative right try to put an ice loincloth on it! Read the story here.
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?Giant_ice_penis_-_is_climate_change_to_blame?&in_article_id=304450&in_page_id=2&penis

Hurricane Ike About To Prove Insurance Journal's May 28th Prediction Of No Texas Hurricanes So Totally Wrong.

What a ludicrous way to predict hurricanes. Rarely does a hurricane hit the Texas coast in an even numbered year they claim. So about to be proven wrong, much to this Houston resident's chagrin. Read the story here.

Hurricane Ike- Remain On Galveston Island, Face "Certain Death" Hurricane Center Says.

SHORELINE OF GALVESTON BAY...15 TO 22 FEETLIFE THREATENING INUNDATION LIKELY!ALL NEIGHBORHOODS...AND POSSIBLY ENTIRE COASTAL COMMUNITIES...WILL BE INUNDATED DURING THE PERIOD OF PEAK STORM TIDE. PERSONSNOT HEEDING EVACUATION ORDERS IN SINGLE FAMILY ONE OR TWO STORYHOMES WILL FACE CERTAIN DEATH. MANY RESIDENCES OF AVERAGECONSTRUCTION DIRECTLY ON THE COAST WILL BE DESTROYED. WIDESPREADAND DEVASTATING PERSONAL PROPERTY DAMAGE IS LIKELY ELSEWHERE.VEHICLES LEFT BEHIND WILL LIKELY BE SWEPT AWAY. NUMEROUS ROADSWILL BE SWAMPED...SOME MAY BE WASHED AWAY BY THE WATER. ENTIREFLOOD PRONE COASTAL COMMUNITIES WILL BE CUTOFF. WATER LEVELS MAYEXCEED 9 FEET FOR MORE THAN A MILE INLAND. COASTAL RESIDENTS INMULTI-STORY FACILITIES RISK BEING CUTOFF. CONDITIONS WILL BEWORSENED BY BATTERING WAVES. SUCH WAVES WILL EXACERBATE PROPERTYDAMAGE...WITH MASSIVE DESTRUCTION OF HOMES...INCLUDING THOSE OFBLOCK CONSTRUCTION. DAMAGE FROM BEACH EROSION COULD TAKE YEARS TO REPAIR.

Read the entire report here. Click on our Hurricane Ike Update Widget for current reports in the sidebar or here.

Instructions On Infant Care, Funny!

Hilarious Instuctions On The Do's And Dont's Of Caring For An Infant

Why The Real Estate Gurus Are Wrong And You Don't Want To Be A Landlord

This renter vacated his apartment leaving over 1,000 polystyrene fast food containers strewn about, not to mention the incredible mountain of cigarette butts carefully stacked on the sink. Ugh. Flat for rent, HUGE deposit! Click on image for a better view and read the story here.