University Dorm Student Sets Fire To Building. 'Student' Is 31 Years Old!

So I am like 31, and I want to go to school, and like sleep in a dorm. No, I am not troubled, there will be no fires. I promise. Read the story here.

Mr. Gay UK Is A Killer Cannibal!

In a stunning tribute to gay cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer Mr. Gay UK killed and ate part of a man. What would Freud think of all this gay man eating. Read the story here.

Amy Crackhouse, I Mean Amy Winehouse To Cut Her Hair. Next Year. Now That's News!

I'm sorry to put you through this, but next year, Amy Winehouse just might cut her hair. Stop the presses. And if she doesn't smoke it she may donate it to Locks Of Reasons To Gouge Your Eardrums Out. Read the story here, if you must.