Financial Bailout So Large That The U. S. Debt Clock in Times Square Will Not Have Enough Digits To Show It! ! !

No, seriously. The clock will only show up to 9 trillion and change and the bailout will push U. S. debt over 11 trillion. And my damn electric bill is due and I am a little short. Read the story here.

Girl Bleeds From Pores With No Cuts Or Scratches, Doctors Baffled.

OK folks, don't get excited on this one, Uncle Skeptic and Aunt Reality will set you straight. It is possible it is a medical condition and that would suck, but let's clarify that it almost certainly will be a hoax! Young girls, these are the ones who take pictures of fairies, have books and plates flying through the air, and act on the Disney Channel, all horribly in need of attention. Put her in dance class. Second, when your last name is Dwivedi, is it wise for your parents to name you Twinkle? Read the story here.

Thieves Have To Leave Behind The Loot, The Car Was To Small To Carry It

Classic. Remember the guns, the lookouts, synchronize your watches, steal 1/2 million dollars. Damn, we really should have bought a full-size vehicle. Wait until these thieves get home and Mom punishes them for having eyes bigger than their bellies, and a car smaller than the money. Read the story here.

Mom Arrested For Giving Baby Beer In Sippy Cup

Well, it shouldn't be much of a surprise anyway, as the cops were there undercover to buy drugs. Charges include trafficking heroin, distribution of marijuana, child abuse... oh yeah, twice she offered to have sex for $100 so also promoting prostitution. Kind of like a grocery store of sin. Read the story here

Shocking X-Ray Of Knife In Boy's Skull.

Mom told you not to play with knives, and now look what has happened. Click on x-ray for a larger view. He survived! Read the whole story here.

Florida Mug Shots, Always Good For A Look!

Tristan Macker, Florida. Possession of Marijuana (Possibly Face Graffiti)

Paul Jackson, Florida. Battery, Theft, Several other charges, and a beautiful smile.

Cheryl Bohanan, Florida. Domestic Violence, and Fuck Off, She's Taken!

Robert Thorton, Florida. Domestic Battery, Disorderly Intoxication. Who would guess?

Chinese Man Floats 1,500 Miles Down River To Promote Olympic Spirit

This Chinese man drifted 1,500 mile down the Yangtze River on an inner tube to promote the Olympic spirit. I bought an extra six-pack of beer with the same intention! Read the story here.

In Another Innertube Story, This Man Robbed A Bank And Escaped Down The River, On An Inner Tube

And whoever would have thought that anything shaped like a donu would ever outrun any cop anywhere? Read the story here.

Landlord Sued For Trying To Run Off Tenants With The Old Bag Of Dead Cats Trick

Where do you get a bag of dead cats anyway. One tenant said "It was so bad, we thought it was a dead body," and indeed it was lady, several of them. Read the sick story here.

Five Disturbing Ads For World Trade Center Ran Before 9-11

Pakistan Airlines, 1979

Asbestos Corporation, 1981

Sesame Street Magazine, 1976

Steel Institute, 1990

World Trade Center brocure, 1981

Man Sues After Doctor Removes His Penis During Cancer Surgery

So the doctors had permission to do whay was medically needed, but they didn't bother waking him up to see if removing the penis was an issue. Hmmm, a hrd case. Read the story here.

Syrah Wine Called Palin? Like Sarah Palin. Funny

Forget your zinfandel, a wine known as a syrah is bottled under the name Palin, and it effectively tracks the popularity of Sarah Palin and the Republican party. In liberal San Francisco it has dropped off in sales , but in Palin's home state of Alaska they cannot import it fast enough. Read the whole story here.

Man Who Sodomized Sheep Does Not Have To Register As A Sex Offender

Wow, he pleaded guilty and got up to 20 years in prison, probably to be the sheep! They used DNA testing to prove the charge. But he doesn't have to register as a sex offender, effectively pulling the wool over the eyes of shepards everywhere. Read the story here.

Horrible Video Of Girl Leaving Baby At A Church In Federal Way, Washington

Sure she has troubles and all, and I am sure her lawyers will ask us to pity her for all the stress she was under, but what a major ass leaves an infant wrapped in a beach towel in 49 degree weather!

Wacky Folks Stealing 666 Road Signs So Much Road Numbers Are Being Changed

Of course, who wouldn't think to stop on a dangerous road in the dead of night so you could have a route 666 sign on your bedroom wall! It goes all to well with the Black Sabbath music dude. Read the story here.