If You Steal 1.6 Million Dollars From The Navy, Probably A Good Idea To Hide It Before Slapping Your Wife Around

Or something like that. After being arrested for domestic abuse, she called his employer, the U. S. Navy and asked them to take his work hear out of her house. Oops. Read the huge theft story here.

Teacher Arrested For Sex With Student, Parents Just Can't Believe It

Parent's in an uproar as she was their kid's favorite student. Dummies. Maybe she is innocent, but until the smoke clears she will not be taking this families children on weekend camping trips. Actually, not even after the smoke clears, I am pretty protective of my own. Teachers wanting to sex up the kids should move to England, the teacher's union there thinks teachers should not be held criminally liable. Read about this teacher here. Read about the British pervs here.

Judge Releases Heroin Addict Burglar Go Despite 145 Crimes

That's way left of center I would say, go free and promise not to be bad again. Surely the other 145 crimes were all a mistake. It's enough to make me want to puke. Here in Texas we might have executed him... just because! Read the story here.

British Teacher's Union Demands Right Have Sex With Students!

That's right, they think no teacher should be prosecuted for sleeping with a student over the age of 16. And what's next, 15? Dear Lord, don't let America's teachers find this out. Read the story here.

Not Really News- Galveston Islanders Who Stayed Behind Died!

So the last thing one woman said on the phone with a friend was "I really messed up this time". That's an understatement. The real news is that so few people died in Galveston, 33 confirmed, about 200 still missing. Read the story here.

Seattle Children's Theatre Producing Stage Version Of 'Night Of The Living Dead'. Huh?

Hmmm, is this a good idea? 'Night of the Living Dead' at the Seattle CHILDREN"S Theatre? No plans yet for a revival of 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre'. Read the story here.

Lingerie Model Guilty Of Bribery Attempt Of Cop To Avoid Ticket.

She pulled $270 cash out of her bra to try and pay her ticket on the spot. Yeah right. How funny, good job Mr. cop! Read the story here.

New Car Designed By Playstation Is Freaking Awesome Looking!

Beautiful. See it here with lots of photos.

Drive Drunk, Hit Signs And Curbs, Cops Following, Go To School To Pick Up Kids.

Well, yeah, don't be late to pick up the kids, the wife will be so mad. What's with the pink mug shot, I do not know, was he THAT toasted? Read the story here.

I Believe Halloween Is Becoming Hookerween.

Yes, so what toadstool have you been hiding under the last ten years, Pimp? Read the story here.

Christine Swift, FL. Contempt Of Court.

Christine Swift, FL. Contempt of Court. Possibly Contempt For Hair Styling Also!

Woman Brings Bat To School, Kids Touch It, Bat Rabid, Parents Too!

This woman bought a dead bat to school and let children touch it. See how soft he is kids? Oh, by the way kids, he has rabies, which can be spread through saliva. Don't worry though, the month long rabies treatment only costs $800 each and will be covered by the school's insurance. Read the story here.

Homer Simpson Casts His Vote For President!

In this scene reportedly from the November 2 episode of 'The Simpsons', Homer has a bit of trouble castng his vote.

Forget Obama And McCain, Vote Cynthia McKinney!

JUST KIDDING! Please check out this story and video where the Green Party presidential candidate Cynthia McKinney claims the Department of Defense killed 5,000 people, mostly men, following hurricane Katrina, with single bullets to the head. How di all the networks miss this? The families of the men, so quiet! Read the whole delusional stroy and watch the video here, and try to refrain from wondering if they have one bullet left...

Girl Spends 1 1/2 Hours Eating At Kentucky Fried Chicken, KFC Fines Their Customer 150 Pounds!

That's right, you sit down with a friend to enjoy 14 pieces of chicken, 6 bags of fries and cokes (5,465 calories!), of course it will take an hour and a half. Uh-oh, 15 minutes longer than this Kentucky Fried Chicken allows their customers to eat. Customers, you know, the ones paying the bills. Several days later a "fine" for 150 pounds arrives in the mail. That's $264.82 for us Yanks. Read the story here.