THE ODD REPORT

Napoleon Dynamite Travels The World

2009-01-28T00:12:00.000-06:00

INVITE HIM TO STAY WITH YOU ! ! !

Santa Poses Nude For 'The Odd Report" Christmas Card

2008-12-24T00:52:00.003-06:00

Wishing a Merry Christmas

and a

Happy New Year

to everyone reading

The Odd Report

Father Of The Year Award!

2008-12-24T00:10:00.009-06:00

How unfortunate that fate drops you into the care of a father like this, one that weighs you down with a historically horrible name, just to satisfy his own leanings.

How unfortunate would it be to go through life as a child Adolf Hitler, exposed to media attention, surely teased and tormented by other kids?

That's the case for little Adolf Hitler Campbell, who for the last two weeks has been the subject of news reports, blog posts, and comments forms, since his father became upset when ShopRite supermarkets refused to make him a cake. A cake that read "Happy Birthday Adolf Hitler"!

Questionable father Heath Campbell and his daughter JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell. That's right, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell. One other unlucky child is dubbed Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, apparently a nod to Nazi Himmler and a death camp.

It's sad that the poor boy had trouble getting a cake for his third birthday, but Wal-Mart relented and made him a cake. This father must truly be a wonderful Dad. Always pressing the point, I assume asking for a cake that did not say "Happy Birthday Adolf", but instead "Happy Birthday Adolf HITLER"! What a cowardly method of living a life and a political belief, to drag a child through that muck. I Only wish Heath's parents had been more insightful and chose a better name for Dad- Asshole Campbell. Heath, listen up...

Read the whole stupid story here.

Snowzilla Giant Snowman Served With A Cease And Desist Order!

2008-12-23T00:51:00.003-06:00

Check out the amazing story of Snowzilla, the tallest snowman in the world at 21 feet. The bad news is halfway through building him this year, all of the traffic and publicity caused the neighbors to complain and the city stuck a cease and desist order in Snowzilla's butt, ending all the fun. Complete details here.

A Complete Run Down Of All The Over-Priced And Less Than Impressive Robot Toys.

2008-12-23T00:39:00.005-06:00

Slate has an excellent article comparing the vast array of various audioanimatronic animals and robotic friends available this Christmas, including Kota the Triceratops in a most unmoving and non-dramatic video. Don't miss the decidedly CREEPY petting of the Pleo, the last video in the article. That woman, or is it a man>, is stroking that toy just a bit to much.

Visit The 'Goodbye George Bush' Countdown Clock!

2008-10-14T10:08:00.002-05:00

Goodbye George Bush

Perhaps The Worst Website Ever. Enjoy!

2008-10-12T00:08:00.003-05:00

'Accept Jesus, Forever Forgiven'. Well, how correct to say- "OH MY GOD"! This has to be one of the most puzzling, annoying, and badly designed websites ever. From the first moment of the screeching cat??? to the seizure inducing rainbow racing across the screen it's bad. Heap on some elevator straight to Hell music and you have a BAD website. Enjoy it here.

Maldives Islands, Heaven On Earth.

2008-10-12T00:03:00.002-05:00

Maldives Islands, south of India and far off the beaten track, difficult and expensive to visit, turns out to be a Heaven on Earth. For more beautiful photos of the Maldives and much more visit Robot Nine.

It's As Good A Time As Any To Celebrate George Bush's Last Days In Office With A Photo Collection

2008-10-11T19:53:00.012-05:00

Yes, the glory days of the Royal Family Bush is coming to an end with George W. Bush. In celebration of his illustrious eight years in office as the leader of the free world, we offer this eclectic collection of some of our President's finest moments. Oh dear God, do I hear Neil Bush in the wings...

Hundreds Of Homeless Driven To Register And Vote In The Same Day By Obama Supporters

2008-10-11T19:44:00.004-05:00

Yes, but can we be so sure they voted for Obama. I mean, really, once in the booth they may have considered Palin's scary religiosity, McCain's recent faith in our strong economy, and the Republicans sure belief that if we pave the way for the rich and corporate America, it will all trickle right down to the street! Throw in Bush's God inspired hatred of science and surely we have a McCain vote. Surely? Read the story here.

'That One', Hilarious Video About President Barack Obama

2008-10-11T19:35:00.005-05:00

Woman Sits On Toilet For A Month, Has To Have Toilet Seat Surgically Removed!

2008-10-09T23:09:00.005-05:00

Surely I read this story wrong. So she has stayed in the bathroom for two years and her "boyfriend" did not find that odd? He finally called for help when she sat on the toilet for a month and her skin fused with the seat? Ick. Good God! That must have been a hell of a magazine she was reading! Or the worst Montezuma's revenge ever. Poor girl, read her sad tale here.

77 Year Old Granny Gets 14 Years For Cocaine Smuggling

2008-10-09T22:59:00.003-05:00

Yeah, but with the leniant judicial system she will probably be out by the time she is 85. Read the story here.

Things Sarah Palin Refers To As "That One"

2008-10-08T22:20:00.003-05:00

John McCain called Barack Obama "That One" in the debate and now we have a great list of 6 things that vice president candidate Sarah Palin also refers to as "That One". Also, don't miss the list of subjects Sarah Palin would be scared to encounter if she ever appeared on the game show Jeopardy. While here please make sure to cast your vote in our election poll in the reight sidebar. Read the lists here.

X-Rays You Do Not Want To Be The Subject Of

2008-10-08T22:14:00.006-05:00

Creepy Robot Girl! I Will Wait For The Adult, Not Creepy Version.

2008-10-07T22:55:00.002-05:00

Man, talk about a creepy little The Grudge robot, I will wait for the less Stepford child version. Call me when they are adult and not scary. Read the story and check out the video here.

Robot WOMAN! Now That's More Like It. Does She Come In Blonde?

2008-10-07T22:50:00.004-05:00

Finally, the perfect companion. How much and how long to deliver? Does she have a volume control? Just kidding. No, really. With awesome scary cool video, read the story here.

Starbuck's- Every One Has A Sink Running All Day For NOTHING!

2008-10-07T22:37:00.004-05:00

So your local Starbucks turns on the tap and let sit run, all day, non-stop- EVER! Times 10,000 Starbucks outlets. Every three minutes one faucet flows out enough to sustain one African person suffering a drought. What a green company. It's all to keep bacteria from growing in the trap and pipes, though NO expert agrees that this is needed. Ever heard of bleach? Read the story here and Starbuck's pathetic denial here, before heading off to check it out at your Starbucks, than grabbing a coffee at the gas station.

Sarah Palin On A Mavericky And Hilarious Blog

2008-10-07T22:20:00.006-05:00

Sarah Palin on a daily blog, funny thoughts, images, ideas. Click here, then add to your favorites.

Woman Gets $200 Fine For Donating ONE Shoe To Homeless Shelter

2008-10-07T22:10:00.002-05:00

Her giving nature led her to dump one shoe, half a shutter and a cabinet door in the parking lot of the homeless shelter. The judges giving nature called it littering and said give the city $200! Read the story here.

University Dorm Student Sets Fire To Building. 'Student' Is 31 Years Old!

2008-10-06T22:10:00.002-05:00

So I am like 31, and I want to go to school, and like sleep in a dorm. No, I am not troubled, there will be no fires. I promise. Read the story here.

Mr. Gay UK Is A Killer Cannibal!

2008-10-06T22:01:00.004-05:00

In a stunning tribute to gay cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer Mr. Gay UK killed and ate part of a man. What would Freud think of all this gay man eating. Read the story here.

Amy Crackhouse, I Mean Amy Winehouse To Cut Her Hair. Next Year. Now That's News!

2008-10-06T21:53:00.002-05:00

I'm sorry to put you through this, but next year, Amy Winehouse just might cut her hair. Stop the presses. And if she doesn't smoke it she may donate it to Locks Of Reasons To Gouge Your Eardrums Out. Read the story here, if you must.

If You Steal 1.6 Million Dollars From The Navy, Probably A Good Idea To Hide It Before Slapping Your Wife Around

2008-10-05T21:10:00.005-05:00

Or something like that. After being arrested for domestic abuse, she called his employer, the U. S. Navy and asked them to take his work hear out of her house. Oops. Read the huge theft story here.

Teacher Arrested For Sex With Student, Parents Just Can't Believe It

2008-10-05T21:01:00.001-05:00

Parent's in an uproar as she was their kid's favorite student. Dummies. Maybe she is innocent, but until the smoke clears she will not be taking this families children on weekend camping trips. Actually, not even after the smoke clears, I am pretty protective of my own. Teachers wanting to sex up the kids should move to England, the teacher's union there thinks teachers should not be held criminally liable. Read about this teacher here. Read about the British pervs here.

Judge Releases Heroin Addict Burglar Go Despite 145 Crimes

2008-10-05T20:52:00.003-05:00

That's way left of center I would say, go free and promise not to be bad again. Surely the other 145 crimes were all a mistake. It's enough to make me want to puke. Here in Texas we might have executed him... just because! Read the story here.

Girl Genius At Oxford Studying Math At 13, Now She Is A Hooker.

2008-10-04T21:59:00.003-05:00

So, when she mathematically compared a professor's income with a high dollar prostitutes... Read the story here and here.

British Teacher's Union Demands Right Have Sex With Students!

2008-10-04T21:52:00.003-05:00

That's right, they think no teacher should be prosecuted for sleeping with a student over the age of 16. And what's next, 15? Dear Lord, don't let America's teachers find this out. Read the story here.

Not Really News- Galveston Islanders Who Stayed Behind Died!

2008-10-04T21:34:00.004-05:00

So the last thing one woman said on the phone with a friend was "I really messed up this time". That's an understatement. The real news is that so few people died in Galveston, 33 confirmed, about 200 still missing. Read the story here.

Seattle Children's Theatre Producing Stage Version Of 'Night Of The Living Dead'. Huh?

2008-10-04T08:36:00.002-05:00

Hmmm, is this a good idea? 'Night of the Living Dead' at the Seattle CHILDREN"S Theatre? No plans yet for a revival of 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre'. Read the story here.

Lingerie Model Guilty Of Bribery Attempt Of Cop To Avoid Ticket.

2008-10-04T08:24:00.004-05:00

She pulled $270 cash out of her bra to try and pay her ticket on the spot. Yeah right. How funny, good job Mr. cop! Read the story here.

New Car Designed By Playstation Is Freaking Awesome Looking!

2008-10-03T21:27:00.003-05:00

Beautiful. See it here with lots of photos.

Drive Drunk, Hit Signs And Curbs, Cops Following, Go To School To Pick Up Kids.

2008-10-03T21:22:00.003-05:00

Well, yeah, don't be late to pick up the kids, the wife will be so mad. What's with the pink mug shot, I do not know, was he THAT toasted? Read the story here.

I Believe Halloween Is Becoming Hookerween.

2008-10-03T21:17:00.001-05:00

Yes, so what toadstool have you been hiding under the last ten years, Pimp? Read the story here.

Christine Swift, FL. Contempt Of Court.

2008-10-03T21:02:00.002-05:00

Christine Swift, FL. Contempt of Court. Possibly Contempt For Hair Styling Also!

Woman Brings Bat To School, Kids Touch It, Bat Rabid, Parents Too!

2008-10-03T20:51:00.004-05:00

This woman bought a dead bat to school and let children touch it. See how soft he is kids? Oh, by the way kids, he has rabies, which can be spread through saliva. Don't worry though, the month long rabies treatment only costs $800 each and will be covered by the school's insurance. Read the story here.

Homer Simpson Casts His Vote For President!

2008-10-03T18:36:00.003-05:00

In this scene reportedly from the November 2 episode of 'The Simpsons', Homer has a bit of trouble castng his vote.

Forget Obama And McCain, Vote Cynthia McKinney!

2008-10-02T23:12:00.002-05:00

JUST KIDDING! Please check out this story and video where the Green Party presidential candidate Cynthia McKinney claims the Department of Defense killed 5,000 people, mostly men, following hurricane Katrina, with single bullets to the head. How di all the networks miss this? The families of the men, so quiet! Read the whole delusional stroy and watch the video here, and try to refrain from wondering if they have one bullet left...

Girl Spends 1 1/2 Hours Eating At Kentucky Fried Chicken, KFC Fines Their Customer 150 Pounds!

2008-10-02T22:52:00.003-05:00

That's right, you sit down with a friend to enjoy 14 pieces of chicken, 6 bags of fries and cokes (5,465 calories!), of course it will take an hour and a half. Uh-oh, 15 minutes longer than this Kentucky Fried Chicken allows their customers to eat. Customers, you know, the ones paying the bills. Several days later a "fine" for 150 pounds arrives in the mail. That's $264.82 for us Yanks. Read the story here.

Rosie O'Donnell To Get New Show. Dear God, Let It NOT Be True!

2008-10-02T22:28:00.003-05:00

It is true, with a "test segment" to air the night before Thanksgiving. Rosie O'Irritating? Rosie O'Obnoxious? Rosie O'WhyIsn'tSheDead? Don't forget what a condescending twit she was with the ever polite Tom Selleck, which contributed to the downward spiral of her last disaster. Watch the video of poor Tom below. Read the story so you can be busy cooking turkey rather than watching one here.

Five Really Cool And Incredibly Tiny Artworks Of Willard Wigan

2008-10-02T22:17:00.006-05:00

U.K. artist Willard Wigan creates incredible and incredibly tiny works of art in the eyes of needles and on the heads of pins.

Woman Buys Home In eBay Auction For $1.75!

2008-10-02T07:27:00.005-05:00

OK, so it's a little run down, and also has $850 in back taxes due, but $1.75? Eight bids came in and it went to $1.75? So she was like, "Well, it's at $1.50, I guess I will go to $1.75", and nobody else even tried. Anyway, now with the housing crisis and financial meltdown, will she be able to finance and hold onto the property? Read the story here.

Seven Papercut Artworks Of Peter Callesen

2008-10-01T23:12:00.009-05:00

To see more of Peter Callesen's incredible art visit his website.

Theives Steal 5,000 Regular Size Condoms and One Giant Inflatable One

2008-10-01T22:53:00.004-05:00

Thieves in Mexico looted a 'condom-mobile' and stole 5,000 condoms, 800 HIV tests, and a 23 foot inflatable condom! Now that's ambitious. Read the story here.

'The Testicle Cookbook: Cooking With Balls'. No, I'm Serious.

2008-10-01T22:46:00.004-05:00

Yes, 'The Testicle Cookbook' is now available, in case you have been seeking guidance. They lost me at "wash testicles thoroughly for 30-45 minute." Read the story here. Visit the e-book websote YUBU.com.

Woman In Cow Suit Arrested For Chasing Children, More. Mug Shot!

2008-10-01T07:53:00.004-05:00

This woman was arrested for dressing in a cow suit and chasing neighborhood children, and peeing on the neighbor's porch. 'Udderly' ridiculous. Read the story here.

Financial Bailout So Large That The U. S. Debt Clock in Times Square Will Not Have Enough Digits To Show It! ! !

2008-10-01T07:27:00.005-05:00

No, seriously. The clock will only show up to 9 trillion and change and the bailout will push U. S. debt over 11 trillion. And my damn electric bill is due and I am a little short. Read the story here.

Girl Bleeds From Pores With No Cuts Or Scratches, Doctors Baffled.

2008-09-30T23:09:00.003-05:00

OK folks, don't get excited on this one, Uncle Skeptic and Aunt Reality will set you straight. It is possible it is a medical condition and that would suck, but let's clarify that it almost certainly will be a hoax! Young girls, these are the ones who take pictures of fairies, have books and plates flying through the air, and act on the Disney Channel, all horribly in need of attention. Put her in dance class. Second, when your last name is Dwivedi, is it wise for your parents to name you Twinkle? Read the story here.

Thieves Have To Leave Behind The Loot, The Car Was To Small To Carry It

2008-09-30T22:52:00.003-05:00

Classic. Remember the guns, the lookouts, synchronize your watches, steal 1/2 million dollars. Damn, we really should have bought a full-size vehicle. Wait until these thieves get home and Mom punishes them for having eyes bigger than their bellies, and a car smaller than the money. Read the story here.

Mom Arrested For Giving Baby Beer In Sippy Cup

2008-09-30T22:36:00.002-05:00

Well, it shouldn't be much of a surprise anyway, as the cops were there undercover to buy drugs. Charges include trafficking heroin, distribution of marijuana, child abuse... oh yeah, twice she offered to have sex for $100 so also promoting prostitution. Kind of like a grocery store of sin. Read the story here

Shocking X-Ray Of Knife In Boy's Skull.

2008-09-30T22:26:00.001-05:00

Mom told you not to play with knives, and now look what has happened. Click on x-ray for a larger view. He survived! Read the whole story here.

Florida Mug Shots, Always Good For A Look!

2008-09-30T18:12:00.006-05:00

Tristan Macker, Florida. Possession of Marijuana (Possibly Face Graffiti)

Paul Jackson, Florida. Battery, Theft, Several other charges, and a beautiful smile.

Cheryl Bohanan, Florida. Domestic Violence, and Fuck Off, She's Taken!

Robert Thorton, Florida. Domestic Battery, Disorderly Intoxication. Who would guess?

Chinese Man Floats 1,500 Miles Down River To Promote Olympic Spirit

2008-09-30T18:05:00.002-05:00

This Chinese man drifted 1,500 mile down the Yangtze River on an inner tube to promote the Olympic spirit. I bought an extra six-pack of beer with the same intention! Read the story here.

In Another Innertube Story, This Man Robbed A Bank And Escaped Down The River, On An Inner Tube

2008-09-30T17:57:00.002-05:00

And whoever would have thought that anything shaped like a donu would ever outrun any cop anywhere? Read the story here.

Landlord Sued For Trying To Run Off Tenants With The Old Bag Of Dead Cats Trick

2008-09-30T17:46:00.002-05:00

Where do you get a bag of dead cats anyway. One tenant said "It was so bad, we thought it was a dead body," and indeed it was lady, several of them. Read the sick story here.

Five Disturbing Ads For World Trade Center Ran Before 9-11

2008-09-30T13:13:00.005-05:00

Pakistan Airlines, 1979

Asbestos Corporation, 1981

Sesame Street Magazine, 1976

Steel Institute, 1990

World Trade Center brocure, 1981

Man Sues After Doctor Removes His Penis During Cancer Surgery

2008-09-30T10:27:00.002-05:00

So the doctors had permission to do whay was medically needed, but they didn't bother waking him up to see if removing the penis was an issue. Hmmm, a hrd case. Read the story here.

Syrah Wine Called Palin? Like Sarah Palin. Funny

2008-09-30T10:12:00.005-05:00

Forget your zinfandel, a wine known as a syrah is bottled under the name Palin, and it effectively tracks the popularity of Sarah Palin and the Republican party. In liberal San Francisco it has dropped off in sales , but in Palin's home state of Alaska they cannot import it fast enough. Read the whole story here.

Man Who Sodomized Sheep Does Not Have To Register As A Sex Offender

2008-09-30T10:04:00.003-05:00

Wow, he pleaded guilty and got up to 20 years in prison, probably to be the sheep! They used DNA testing to prove the charge. But he doesn't have to register as a sex offender, effectively pulling the wool over the eyes of shepards everywhere. Read the story here.

Horrible Video Of Girl Leaving Baby At A Church In Federal Way, Washington

2008-09-30T09:50:00.003-05:00

Sure she has troubles and all, and I am sure her lawyers will ask us to pity her for all the stress she was under, but what a major ass leaves an infant wrapped in a beach towel in 49 degree weather!

Wacky Folks Stealing 666 Road Signs So Much Road Numbers Are Being Changed

2008-09-30T09:44:00.002-05:00

Of course, who wouldn't think to stop on a dangerous road in the dead of night so you could have a route 666 sign on your bedroom wall! It goes all to well with the Black Sabbath music dude. Read the story here.

In Cambodia Rat Meat Prices Skyrocket To $1.50 Per Kilo. So Stop Griping About Gas Costs!

2008-09-28T10:04:00.003-05:00

That's right, when your agriculture is not up to par and any chicken might be carrying Avian flu, rats start to look like Big Mac's running around the barn at night. And yes, they do eat rats in other parts of the world, among other adventorous offerings. Read the whole story here.

Quadriplegic Arrested For Filming Underage Girls In Shower.

2008-09-28T09:47:00.003-05:00

So I don't know what's sicker, stupider or most amazing. This sick puppy should surely get the book thrown at him, but how in the world does a person who CANNOT move do this. He MUST have had some help, right Sherlock Holmes? And is this not a huge case of useless effort. I can only assume a man wants to see naked girls for sexual purposes and surely a QUADRIPLEGIC must have problems using this information, if you know what I mean. Read the story here.

Priest Counseling Couple Quits, Moves In With Wife, Gets Sued By Husband.

2008-09-28T09:28:00.003-05:00

God, this is good. Better than a soap opera. That's what happens when a couple might be having problems with their sexual relationship, children, or marriage, and they seek advice from a man who has experienced none of these and bases his advice on an antiquated book about an angry God! Read the story here.

Denver Police Issue 'Funny' T-Shirts Commemorating The Possible Beating Of Democratic National Convention Protestors.

2008-09-28T09:20:00.004-05:00

Now how's that for a bad idea, even if it seemed funny in the meeting. Click on the image fro a better view. A Denver detective says they have not received any complaints. Well now that 'The Odd Report' is on the case, you will. Read the story here.

Thieves Try To Sell Stolen Goods Back To The Owner

2008-09-28T09:13:00.005-05:00

Maybe they should have gone into the kidnapping field instead? Read the stupid story here.

Shockingly Bad Weather Conditions In Antarctica. Put A Jacket On If You Run To The Car!

2008-09-27T23:29:00.005-05:00

Door to Hell in Antarctica - Watch more free videos
Check out these rather harsh weather conditions in Antarctica, then when the winter comes, shut up!

Sarah Palin Gets Hit On By Pakistan President!

2008-09-27T23:07:00.004-05:00

President Zardari complimented Palin on her beauty in a long, warm handshake, twice, all this and his wife Benazir Bhutto is barely cold after her recent assassination. Read the story here. See the pissed-off Pakastani newscasts here. Well, since Benazir was killed, Sarah is the hottest politician going.

Metal Plates Inside Luggage Sends Message To Those Always Smiling Airport Security Guards. Order Yours Today!

2008-09-27T22:52:00.004-05:00

And for a real laugh, put a metal cutout in the shape of a pistol in Grandma's luggage. For years you all will laugh about her trip to Des Moines! Read the story here.

750 Gorillas Run Wild On Streets Of London, England!

2008-09-27T22:43:00.002-05:00

It's like 'Planet of the Apes' with a jogging yuppie twist. Great fun, neat idea, read the story here or visit the website here.

Just Because You Die, Don't Think You Can Avoid That Final Cell Phone Bill

2008-09-27T22:35:00.004-05:00

T-Mobile continued to send this woman's mother her cell phone bill despite several phone calls and a mailed death notice! When the deceased failed to pay they turned the bill over to a collection agency. No dropped calls, even in death. Read the story here.

Muslim Man Sues Employer, A Grocery Warehouse, Because He Has To Move Alcohol In Warehouse With A Forklift.

2008-09-27T22:20:00.004-05:00

Muslim man sues his employer, a grocery chain, because the evil heathens insisted he use the forklift to move ALCOHOL around the warehouse. He claims they never told him he would have to do that when he was hired. Here's a great idea- get a new job! Read the whole stupid story here.

Woman Finds Dead Bat In Coffee Maker. Next Time Order Decaf, Debat.

2008-09-27T20:14:00.002-05:00

So late that night when she cleaned the coffee filter, there was the dead bat. I once made tea with the coffee grounds still in the maker, and my girlfriend liked the taste. Toffee? Cea? Read the story here.

Couple Can't Spare Time To Bring Child Home, Brings Child To Do Drug Deal

2008-09-27T11:43:00.013-05:00

The time constraints of being a good drug dealer. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do, even if it means bringing your child to sell Ecstasy tabs. And who ever would have suspected such from such an attractive young couple. Strangely, not in Florida? Read the story here.

Out On Bail, But Not For Long

2008-09-27T11:37:00.003-05:00

Conrad Baum

Hillsborough County, Florida (Of Course)

Attempted Murder

"Out On Bail", Not For Long

Battery Charges For Farting On A Cop Are Dropped

2008-09-27T11:27:00.002-05:00

To fart when a cop is arresting you is bad form, to fan it toward the cop just might be battery. Maybe not as charges are dropped and sop is expected to fully recover. Read the story here.

Muslim Cleric Who Celebrated 9-11 Gets Payback, Daughter A Busty Topless Pole Dancer!

2008-09-26T23:19:00.003-05:00

In the classic twist on the preacher's wild daughter, Muslim cleric Omar Bakri, kicked out of Britain for his hateful views, found out his wild daughter, Yasmin Fostok, is an unwed mother, adventurous in bed, and a busty pole dancer. Read the story here.

Farmer Dyes Sheep Blue To Track Their Sexy Habits!

2008-09-26T23:04:00.005-05:00

British farmer dyed some sheep blue so it would rub off on the ewes and he would know which were "in lamb". Kind of like catching them red-handed, only blue. Kinky farmer. Read the story here.

Amazing Collection Of Mug Shots Not To Be Missed!

2008-09-26T22:52:00.002-05:00

Compliments of "The Smoking Gun", an incredible 'lineup' of assorted thieves, transvestites, drunks, and various other lawbreakers- allegedly! Enjoy the show here.

Woman Hogs Hotel Computer, Man Stabs Her Three Times

2008-09-26T22:42:00.002-05:00

When he felt she was hogging the computer at the hotel business center he stabbed her three times with a steak knife. What a sharp temper! Read the story here.

Teen Tries To Have Mom Killed So He Can Spend Her Money On Girlfirend's Boob Job.

2008-09-26T22:29:00.003-05:00

Teen hires two "hit men" to kill his mother with a baseball bat, so he will have money from her bank account to pay the rent and buy his girlfriend a boob job. Where he is headed now, HE will be the girlfriend. Read the story here.

China Releases Transcript Of Astronaut Conversations. Before The Rocket Is Launched.

2008-09-25T23:06:00.004-05:00

China released news of their latest space launch, including transcripts of detailed dialogue between the space vehicle and the base. All several hours before the actual rocket left the launch pad. Surely that little Olympic athlete was of legal competition age, right. Read the story here.

Kentucky Town Drunk Arrested Over 1,300 Times!

2008-09-25T22:55:00.003-05:00

Henry Earl of Kentucky has been arrested over 1,300 times, mostly for public intoxication, and has spent over 5,000 days in custody. Avoid hangovers Henry, stay drunk! Read the story here.

28! Students Suspended. For Cooking Breakfast. Next Time, Just Smoke Pot In The Bathroom Kids! Make It Count.

2008-09-25T22:47:00.003-05:00

I find it hard to believe that the kids realize "it was a foolish thing to do", unless of course they are referring to the knucklehead administrators suspending them. Read the story here.

Politician Wants To Pay Women To Be Made Infertile!

2008-09-25T22:34:00.008-05:00

Louisiana representative says lower income people have more babies, drain resources, wants to pay women $1,000 to voluntarily have their tubes tied, preventing pregnancy. Many are outraged, but come on, you know what he says is true. I'm outraged, they are offering too much, we should start at $100! Read the story here.

German's Build An Upside Down House. Just Because.

2008-09-12T16:02:00.003-05:00

All that expense just to enable an alternative point of view? Or did they really have the blueprints upside-down? Read the story here.

Antipodes Map. Drill Through The Earth And See What's Exactly On The Other Side From You.

2008-09-12T15:02:00.005-05:00

What a cool map, just find your location on the top map and the bottom shows where you would be on the other side of the Earth. On this side I am in Humble, TX, right in the path of Hurricane Ike. On the other side I would be drowning in the ocean! Great choices. Fun and a cool diversion from all this hurricane worrying. Visit the site here.

Dad Finds Naked Boy In Daughter's Room, Hits Him With Pipe! I'd Have Done The Same.

2008-09-12T14:55:00.003-05:00

Now the question is, what to hit the daughter with? Read the story here.

Hurricane Ike Hours Away From Houston- And ME! Check Out This Windspeed Prediction Site.

2008-09-12T14:43:00.003-05:00

Excellent and interesting site, just roll the cursor over your zip code, see the projected wind speed, and kiss your stuff goodbye. I am in 77346 just so you know, 87 MPH sustained winds. Visit the site here.

Mugger Picks Female Victim. Woman Happens To Be Four Time Italian Karate Champion. Woman Kicks Mugger's Ass.

2008-09-12T01:43:00.002-05:00

In a case of getting exactly what you deserve this sleazy mugger picked a female potential victim who just happened to be a black belt, four-time Italian Karate champ. After putting the hurt on the crook, Italian police haul him away. Read the story here.

The News Is Australian Man Bitten By Venomous Brown Snake. The Odd Part Is He Was Bitten On The Penis!

2008-09-12T01:34:00.002-05:00

The call of nature on a lonely road, but still, you should always look carefully, especially in Australia where everything is deadly. This poor fellow stooped to do his business and a deadly Brown snake bit him on the penis. Read the story here.

And In Related Penis News, Giant Ice Penis Found Floating In The Ocean

2008-09-12T01:27:00.003-05:00

An iceberg that is anatomically correct has been found floating in the sea near Antarctica. Naturally shaped or the product of oversexed penguins? We may never know. It's only a matter of time before the conservative right try to put an ice loincloth on it! Read the story here.
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?Giant_ice_penis_-_is_climate_change_to_blame?&in_article_id=304450&in_page_id=2&penis

Hurricane Ike About To Prove Insurance Journal's May 28th Prediction Of No Texas Hurricanes So Totally Wrong.

2008-09-12T01:20:00.004-05:00

What a ludicrous way to predict hurricanes. Rarely does a hurricane hit the Texas coast in an even numbered year they claim. So about to be proven wrong, much to this Houston resident's chagrin. Read the story here.

Hurricane Ike- Remain On Galveston Island, Face "Certain Death" Hurricane Center Says.

2008-09-11T20:39:00.003-05:00

SHORELINE OF GALVESTON BAY...15 TO 22 FEETLIFE THREATENING INUNDATION LIKELY!ALL NEIGHBORHOODS...AND POSSIBLY ENTIRE COASTAL COMMUNITIES...WILL BE INUNDATED DURING THE PERIOD OF PEAK STORM TIDE. PERSONSNOT HEEDING EVACUATION ORDERS IN SINGLE FAMILY ONE OR TWO STORYHOMES WILL FACE CERTAIN DEATH. MANY RESIDENCES OF AVERAGECONSTRUCTION DIRECTLY ON THE COAST WILL BE DESTROYED. WIDESPREADAND DEVASTATING PERSONAL PROPERTY DAMAGE IS LIKELY ELSEWHERE.VEHICLES LEFT BEHIND WILL LIKELY BE SWEPT AWAY. NUMEROUS ROADSWILL BE SWAMPED...SOME MAY BE WASHED AWAY BY THE WATER. ENTIREFLOOD PRONE COASTAL COMMUNITIES WILL BE CUTOFF. WATER LEVELS MAYEXCEED 9 FEET FOR MORE THAN A MILE INLAND. COASTAL RESIDENTS INMULTI-STORY FACILITIES RISK BEING CUTOFF. CONDITIONS WILL BEWORSENED BY BATTERING WAVES. SUCH WAVES WILL EXACERBATE PROPERTYDAMAGE...WITH MASSIVE DESTRUCTION OF HOMES...INCLUDING THOSE OFBLOCK CONSTRUCTION. DAMAGE FROM BEACH EROSION COULD TAKE YEARS TO REPAIR.

Read the entire report here. Click on our Hurricane Ike Update Widget for current reports in the sidebar or here.

Instructions On Infant Care, Funny!

2008-09-11T20:32:00.002-05:00

Hilarious Instuctions On The Do's And Dont's Of Caring For An Infant

Why The Real Estate Gurus Are Wrong And You Don't Want To Be A Landlord

2008-09-11T20:24:00.003-05:00

This renter vacated his apartment leaving over 1,000 polystyrene fast food containers strewn about, not to mention the incredible mountain of cigarette butts carefully stacked on the sink. Ugh. Flat for rent, HUGE deposit! Click on image for a better view and read the story here.

Verizon Tech Accused Of Making Illegal Sex Calls. $220 Thousand Dollars Worth!

2008-09-11T20:05:00.002-05:00

So all those stories your boyfriend told you about him NOT making those calls just might be true. $220,000 worth? That's 45,000 minutes, or 750 hours! His 'dialing hand' must be really tired and sore. Read the story here.

"I'm Goin' To Niagara, To Get Some Viagara."

2008-09-11T19:45:00.001-05:00

What possibly could be worse than rap, regular, everyday, horrible rap? Granny Rap. Video included and I will leave it at that. Read the story here.

San Antonio To Recycle 90% Of Human Waste For Energy. How's That For Being Green?

2008-09-10T21:33:00.003-05:00

San Antonio will generate methane and therefore energy from 90% of it's human waste. Not a crappy idea at all. 1.5 million cubic feet of gas per day, makes you kind of wonder about all the lost opportunity in years past. Read the story here.

Black Church Sues To Shut Down "Redneck Store", Local Will Have To Settle For Spring "White Sales"

2008-09-10T21:02:00.005-05:00

In a complicated series of real estate deals the church may own the building, but probably has no legal right to stop the "Redneck Store" from operating and selling KKK merchandise. This might bode badly for the Satan Store down the street. Read the story here.